kennon

last night, i was talking with my friend lindsay. she was quite inquisitive about LOML's and my "fake" child, kennon, as mentioned here. more so why, after we had known each other since the fifth grade, cheered together, had crushes on the same boys together, pledged the same sorority together, and in fact lived together, had i never told her that LOMLand i had a "fake" son. my family surely is curious as well. i figure i should let everyone know a little bit more about our dear kennon.

it all started in august. LOML and i gave each other internet service for christmas (i know, NICE), and finally jumped on the bellsouth bandwagon early august. in turn came my addiction to facebook and blogging- but that is another story. anyway, in order to get internet, you must have a basic phone line as well. by basic, i mean the most basic luxuries you can get on a phone line- local calling alone. no fancy schmancy stuff...not even caller id. if our phone rings it is either my sister, my MIL, michele, a telemarketer, or kennon's high school.

any time the phone rings at about 5:15, i refuse to answer it, as i have memorized the voice and words that will come from the other end: "attention parents, your child, (insert name-kennon-this is said in a male voice while the rest of the message is in a female voice) has an unexcused absence on (insert date; male voice). again, your child (insert name-kennon) has an unexcused absence on (insert date). please call the school at (number) with any questions or concerns."

the first time we got the automated call, i dismissed it. the second, third, and fourth times, i called to try and fix it. conveniently, the high school's office is closed when the calls come in...LOML and i have both called numerous times to no relief. all i know is that our precious kennon keeps skipping school and i am more than disappointed in him. on the flip side, kennon is getting away with a heck of a lot more than his parents can begin to know about.

i am thankful that at this time in my life, i am not the parent of a teenage boy!